Here is Britain's most unhygienic family, proudly boasting about how many times they have had a bath in the last year. Father leads the dirty stakes - he's "washed twice". Mother isn't far off with a paltry "washed 4 times". Only the dog lets the side down, he's "lost count".
Wait. Hang on - I've read the small print now: they're talking about how many times they have washed their Patons Flair jumpers. It all makes sense now. "Now you can knit and know that the good-looking things you will make will stand up marvellously to the rough and tumble of family life".
In a brilliantly confusing manner, the advert ends, "These handknits were machine-washed and spin-dried. Machine-wash your own handknits if you must, but hand-knitting does deserve hand-washing". In other words, don't do what we did, kids.
From Stitchcraft magazine, 1964.